Bird House

13 Jun

Without a doubt, truth is stranger than fiction. For example, take this incident which happened to my friend JM, from email:

JM: Happy Thursday to you.

There is a bird in my house. I just got down from my shower, and there was a runny white substance on my computer screen. I couldn’t imagine what it was, I was looking at the ceiling, nothing, then my cat was acting all weird, I clean of my screen, and in the corner is a small grey bird. ….went to get my broom to swoosh it out, now can’t find it. AAARGH. I don’t know how it got in. What a day. I hope it is not destroying my house. My cat apparently doesn’t have much of a hunting instinct, cause now that it not in general site, cat is not interested in finding.

I want the bird out!

ME: We get them here in the office from time to time. Best you can do is open some windows and do a sweep around the house with your broom. Look up for places bird might be able to perch and look down in case he isn’t doing so well.

You’re gonna have to have a sit down with your cat.

JM: Well, upon further inspection, the cat must’ve gotten at the bird, cause there appear to be blood stains in corner. So, I have an injured bird somewhere in the house. Have done a scan all around, and cannot find. I keep going up to the cat and asking where is the bird–but he’s not talking.

I think I freaked the cat out, cause when I saw the bird, I swooped the cat up and put him in the basement while I was en route to broom–cause i had opened back screen door and didn’t want cat to get out. There is a very very small chance bird went out of open screen, but my back was only turned for a second and I think it went toward living room, and there is no sign of injured bird in back yard….

However, my freak out reaction has in turn freaked out my cat a bit.

So, I am looking up, down and all around for more bird blood or poop.

This is not the distraction I was expecting from the job search today

ME: What did we say about being a little specific in what we wish for otherwise being at the mercy of the universe to interpret? Of course, why should it ever have entered your mind to specifically not wish for bird bloopers?

You’ve clearly got a case of the circle of life going on at your place today.

Is this in any way related to the critter removal you were talking about recently?

JM: I originally thought it might. but, I went out to weed in the back this a.m., when I came back, i could see that I had not pulled the sliding screen door all the way over- had maybe a 2 inch opening…so, this poor little bird could have easily bopped his way in here…

Yeah, I was trying to figure out what the universe was trying to tell me- first by finding bird shit on my computer screen, then, with an injured bird trapped in the house.

JM: Ok, the big blood stain I just found under my couch, I’ve got a tragically injured bird somewhere in my house. There are soo many places a bird could go to hide and die in here!!! Aargh

ME: Do you think the cat “could” sniff out hurt bird? Cause your ability to smell dead bird is somewhat limited.

Please wear gloves.

JM: Bird is not dead, just had a siting, I think had been perched by back window, then raced across to front room, where cat chased it, and it flew straight into front window screen, cat chased behind TV. I have my broom and moved all kinda stuff around, can’t find bird.

Cat sniffing around TV.

My lack of ability to smell dead bird has been foremost in my thoughts, especially in the hot, ripe weather.

JM: I also now have a new fear that if I leave back screen open–new birds will come in!

At this point, I had gone to lunch. I came back to find this:

JM: Bird is now out….it was quite a spectacle, after a lovely display of me running around house swooshing with my broom, trying to get bird out either open front door or back door, poor pathetic little bird was a wreck, as was I, I can’t even begin to re-create the noise I was making as I was doing this……bird wound up underneath my wooden ottoman, which is hollow underneath. I took ottoman outside, and it flew out.

The cat, quite animated after the incident, is now chasing the flies that got into the house while I had the doors open.

I have tried to disinfect all signs of bird blood or poop in house. I am now sweating like crazy, and have been quite undone by the whole incident.

Now, I am sure I will completely refocus and pull it together for my job search.

And, still, unclear of what I have learned from the universe today, or what energy I put out into the universe, I know I certainly let some strange sound out into the universe….

Most of the time, this is the kind of thing that only happens to me. So I can only imagine what the universe has in store for me next.


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